Five Rules of Arguing With Your Spouse

Quarrels or disagreements are normal in relationships. They are there, even in the most harmonius relationship. Quarrels and arguments are things that you cannot avoid relationships. And many researches have proven that having arguments are oftentimes much better than suppressing anger.

Arguments can bring positive outcome in a relationship as long as we know how to manage them.

Arguments or quarrels may bring positive influence in a relationship as long as the couple knows how to use them.

So, remember these five rules to get a positive effects from your quarrels:

SPEAK ONE AT A TIME
Never both of you talk at the same time. Give time to your partner to express her/his minds or feelings without interruption. Let she/he finish his/her talking first before you give your opinion. Talk only after your partner has said the things he/she has to say. This way, both of you will have the same opportunity to express your feelings or point of views that masy help in resolving your problems.

TELL YOUR FEELING
When you have arguments with your partner, be open and tell him/her about how you feel concerning the matter. say something like: "I feel so sad when you do bla bla bla...". But don't act like a smart. Do not tell that your partner have done something wrong or make you feel guilty. Focus to your feeling. Tell her/him what you feel for what he had done to you. With this way, your partner will know how he/she hurt you with his/her behaviour.

FOCUS
Stay focus to the problem you face right now. Do not bring up other problems. Solve your problems one by one. Bringing up other problem will only worsen your situation and your problems will never be solved.

EXPRESS YOUR LOVE
If you have disagreements or arguments with your partner, don't let him/her feels that you don't love him/her anymore. You may say to him/her: "I love you, please let me know if you will go home late, because I'm so worried about you." Sometimes, out of control, you may yell at him/her, but never ever tell him/her "I hate you" or "We had better get divorced"

TAKE A REST
If you feel tired, ask him/her sometime for you to take a rest. Maybe after 1 hour, you could talk to him/her again. This way, you would be more calm, so that you two may find a way out for your problems.